How to save a life.

It was ten years ago that I started watching Grey’s Anatomy. Two years after that, I decided that I wanted to save lives myself. This is the impact that the show had on me. This is the impact that the ever so famous Neurosurgeon- Derek Shepherd had on me.
He made me wanted to save lives.

This was not my first emotional encounter with a fictional character. I had done it in the past, felt inspired by a character.
I have been ardently in love with Mr. Darcy for as long as I can remember.

I always held Mr. Darcy in a place of respect. I felt intrigued by fictional characters all the time but Mr. Darcy had that place that no one could ever overtake. That is until, Derek came along.
I didn’t even knew it was happening until it had happened. At first I thought it was Love. It is natural to feel attracted to a fictional character. This conflict soon resolved. What I was feeling for Derek wasn’t attraction. It was beyond that.
I thought that the petty business of attraction towards a guy who is old enough to be your dad, is vague. It didn’t score well with my morals either.
Then I thought maybe I considered Derek of something like a dad and this too was contradicted.
It wasn’t until very late that I realized that I felt for Derek went way beyond the understanding of this world. I realized, I wanted to be Derek or at least be like him. I admired him that much and to this day I do.

I admired him for this character. He was excellent at his job which was saving lives. He was compassionate and passionate at the same time. He was not just a pretty face, but he was hardcore and a hard worker. He felt inspired in the face of fear. He would aim at things, the world refused to aim at. And he had a way with his brain.
It was all this and all more was just who he was. I wanted to be exactly like him.

Derek inspired me. He showed me that those who were capable of saving lives, had a duty to save lives off and for those who couldn’t do it themselves.
I considered for sometime about becoming a doctor; a neurosurgeon at that. I didn’t because it wasn’t me.
I, then did what Derek would have done. I figured out a way to save lives through a way, that was me.

I figured I would save lives by my writings.
My philosophy at the time was simple. There is a stage before physical pain. There comes a time in everyone’s life, when they are in need of help. It is when life gets too much for them to handle on their own, they require someone to whisper in their ears what their hearts already know. It is in that time, where I would jump in and through my words and connotations, I would save someone’s life.

I know how it feels to have your live being saved by someone. Derek Shepherd, saved my life. He did is so gallantly and in such a swift motion, that I was never even aware of it. It had already happened before I knew what had happened.

Unfortunately, after he saved my life, I discarded it. I wasn’t even remotely aware of the burden that I now had over my shoulders. I had the formula in my hand to save lives and yet, I wasn’t even using it to save my life, day and day again. I was fading away because I was so bent on saving the world, when I needed some saving to.
I need saving until the day, I will become Derek.

It’s a beautiful day to save lives.

Every day is a beautiful day to save lives, Derek used to say, every day and every night. That is why I am here, to save my life everyday but more importantly, to save all those other lives, the ones who don’t have a Derek to save their lives. It is my duty to them. It is why Derek saved my life in the first place.
And now I will do the same, I will save lives, everyday, better than he used to.

It is why I am here. I am here to save your life.
It is a beautiful day to save lives.

-Naba Mehdi.