I think everyone might feel this way, or might have felt this way once in their lives.
When you feel the earth rotating around the sun but somehow you are not. As if you are not in the earth. Because the thing is that life is moving on. Day after day. Sunrise after sunrise but you are stuck. You are not moving with it.
But no one notices.
Life was supposed to be good. The universe was supposed to be a friend. So where did we fell short? How did we humans became so lost.
Call it depression or anxiety or sadness or whatever illness, but it is not that. It is the realization of yourself.
It is to be in the knowledge of how much screwed this world has become and how much we are running after pointless things.
We, humans have a brain that is so powerful that it can create fabrications of the desires that one holds in his heart and when the artist sees it all play through this head, he feels the joy that the accomplishment might bring once achieved and somehow, unfortunately, that becomes enough. To feel it though our head becomes enough.
Because we are scared animals. All of us. But the question is who are we scared off? Neglecting religious beliefs, there is no one who is rulling us. We have kings and queens and presidents and prime ministers but we know their names, they don’t know ours. They are not rulling us, they just live in their own fabrication that are in power.
And even with them, there are so many of them. So many countries and so many presidents and all of them, all always at each other’s throats.
So, it is in fact we ourselves, harming each other. We are all scared of none other than each other, even though we are all equal. I can do to you, what you can do to me. And we do that to each other. If it weren’t for that? Why would I feel so lost today? Or why would you have had to fight yesterday, to find yourself? And then cry on your pillow for losing yet again.
The fabrication in my head is to why we are lost is, that Because the universe gave up on us. It let down on its promise that it made to each and every one of us on the moments that we were born.
It made a promise, and the deal was sealed when we felt all that warmth and air all with the force of millions of tiny atomic particles touching us all over, as we came out of our mothers womb. It promised us that it would provide with people to keep us company in the light of the sun and when the moon shone, it would remind us, with all these thoughts in our heads that we needn’t be afraid. And then, the universe promised that it would guide us all through life and will finally reveal itself when we enter into eternal peace.
But we never got so far. It have us all people and in that crowd we forget to smile to the universe and heart broken, it lost us.
Little did we know, that we’d be losing ourself.
With us on our own. We are terrorizing each other. And we allow ourselves to be terrorized.
In that terror, a child loses its dreams. A boy gives up on his happily every after. A girl gives on being equal and as a boy. A mother gives into fear that never ends. A father gives into slavery.
And the universe broke its word and abandoned us.
With out watching over us, we are retaliating in fear, fear of the unknown, fear of what might happen to us, if we chose to live, if we chose to be who we are. If I chose to post this on my Facebook? Because truth be told, then all of my 267 friends, will gain judgement about me and who knows I might just lose myself a little more us? But then I will play my part in the cycle and I will immediately find a person and make him lose some of himself and the cycle will continue.
And the universe will keep on crying.
Why have we made life so Shit? Shit was supposed to be good. Shit.